Try On a New Life For Size

When you think of someone starting a new life, you picture someone who has just faced one of life’s many tragedies—a divorce, a loss, something that forces them to begin again. You imagine them grieving an old version of themselves while trying to create a new one.

But what if you’re not grieving anything at all? What if you’re perfectly happy—grateful, even—for the life you’ve been given, and yet you still feel something pulling you in a different direction? A call to meet a version of yourself you don’t fully recognize yet… but know you’re meant to become.

Because this kind of change is different. It’s not born out of loss—it’s chosen. And that makes it just as terrifying. There’s no guarantee it will be better. No clear reason to leave. Just the feeling that staying the same is no longer an option.

One year in, I still have moments where I yearn for my California life. But then I think about the moment I arrived—driving in from New Jersey, catching my first glimpse of her skyline. The way she called to me.

Almost as if she were saying—

Welcome to your new life.
Welcome to New York.

And oh my gosh, does it feel good to finally meet her—your new home and the new you. Everything feels so shiny and new. Grabbing your morning coffee, shopping at the grocery store, going for a walk to explore your new neighborhood—it’s all exciting, every moment a new adventure.

Even when you look in the mirror, you see a new face staring back at you. Because who is this diva just casually moving to New York? It’s like going shopping and trying on a dress you love but never thought would look good on. Not only does it look good on you, it looks like it was MADE for you. And it was.

The alignment I felt from the universe was all the validation I needed. I was exactly where I was supposed to be, at exactly the right time.

But was it too good to be true? When would the other shoe drop?

Because if there’s one thing life has taught me, it’s this: nothing worth having comes easy. And the best things? They almost always come at a cost.

And New York was about to show me exactly what that meant.

Concrete jungle where dreams are…made of?

It didn’t take long for New York to answer those questions of doubt. Within two months of landing here—after moving my entire life across the country—I lost my job. I’ll try not to repeat myself too much here, but if you read my earlier blog, Starting Over in NYC: An Era of Reinvention, you already know what a gut punch that was.

Having to deal with it without the support system I’d had for the last 36 years back in California made it even harder.

In fact, that was the hardest part. I have always had such incredible support from my friends and family—and I had left them all behind. Not just sadness, but guilt sat deep in my stomach, like I had deserted everyone I knew and life was punishing me for it.

Independence hits differently when it’s not romantic anymore.

But I picked myself up. Got a brand new shiny job and kept going. And along the way, I started building a new support system. Not the same as the one I left in California—but a support system nonetheless.

Things settled…for a while. But after a few months of pushing myself harder than I should have—missing Thanksgiving with my family, working nonstop—my body started fighting back. Breaking out in hives from the stress.

This wasn’t the dream life I had in mind. Again.
Did I make a mistake?

After a month in Antarctica and South America in December, I came back to a very cold, very snowy New York knowing something was going to have to change. And like clockwork, life didn’t waste any time making that decision for me.

I lost—yes, you guessed it—another job.

While New York sat at a high of 15 degrees, cold and covered in snow, I checked the weather back in California.

70 degrees. Sunny.

Was this my sign to go back home?

California Love or Was It All a Dream?

Just as quickly as the call for home arrived in my mind, I shifted into action. We’ve already done the dramatic job loss, the kind where you question everything. Not this time. This time, I sent one text an hour after losing my job… and that one text secured my placement with my now employer.

That’s how quickly things happened. Not because everything comes easy. No. I learned from the first go-around not to fully invest emotionally into a job, and I kept conversations warm with another opportunity. Thank God I did. Because this one fits like a glove, the same way New York did when I stepped into it.

But honestly… who was this version of Brittany? The one who could dust herself off instantly and secure an even better job. Again?

She’s New York Brittany, obviously. Not better than California Brittany. Just a little more cutthroat, a little more assertive.

The contrast between the two versions of me made me think about the difference between California and New York.

California… she’s beautiful and warm. Easy to love. She welcomes you with open arms. Something about her feels familiar—like you belong there instantly. Her sunny weather, her beaches… the way the mountains sit quietly in the distance, like they’ve always been there waiting for you. She gives you space to breathe, to move slowly, to just be. She loves you immediately.

New York… she’s magnetic, but demanding. A little unpredictable—down to her chaotic weather—and she’ll make you question everything you thought you knew. She challenges you in ways you’ve never been challenged before, pushes you to your limits. And just when you think you can’t take anymore, she gives you something small, just enough to keep you going.

The way the city glows right before sunset between buildings.
The hum of the city at night when you’re walking home alone, but don’t feel alone.

And that’s when I started to understand her.

She doesn’t love you easily. But when she does, you know you’ve earned it.

If You Can Make It Here…

I understand this line more than ever now, because it’s true. When you find your way in a city like New York—one that can so easily chew you up and spit you out if you don’t stand up for yourself—you realize you can make it through anything life throws your way.

And there’s something that shifts when you know that. When you’ve lived it. When you’ve had no choice but to figure it out and keep going.

All because I dared to step out of my comfort zone… and try on a different life for size.

Whether it’s a new city, a new style, a new hobby, or something you can’t quite put into words yet—if you feel like life is calling you to make a shift, you owe it to yourself to answer.

Not because your life isn’t good… but because growth doesn’t happen inside our comfort zones. And growth? That’s where we truly start to live.

You just might find…
that the version of you waiting on the other side is stronger, bolder, and far more capable than you ever imagined.

Et voilà. You meet her.